5 Habits to Reduce Stress

After 25 years of coaching, researching and learning on this topic, here are the five simple daily habits to reduce stress that I rely on – for me, and for the people I support. 

1. Move  

It’s that simple.  We are not built to be sedentary – and our bodies know it. Lack of movement can, in itself, be a stressor, even if there are no other triggers to stress.  And then, when we feel any kind of stress or upset, our bodies release cortisol and adrenaline.  This change in our blood chemistry is preparing us for flight or fight. So very useful if you’re an athlete about to compete, or you need to fight off an attacker.  However, when we’re sat at work, trying to solve problems, those stress hormones can really derail us. 

Adrenaline is the immediate stress response that kicks in when your brain thinks there’s danger or pressure. It increases your heartrate and speeds up your breathing, often making you feel jittery, shaky or on edge. Cortisol is the primary hormone your body releases when you’re stressed, and high cortisol levels over prolonged periods can negatively affect your health, including your immune system and mood. Studies show that regular physical activity helps to reduce cortisol levels in the body, which can help lower overall stress. 

“But I hate running”, I hear you say, “I don’t have time to go to the gym”. Listen, if there’s one thing I know all too well, it’s that sometimes there are simply not enough hours in the day. I also know that not everyone is naturally gazelle-like in their athletic ability. However, no one’s saying you need to start training for a marathon. In fact, studies show that you can improve your mood and reduce anxiety levels from as little as 5-10 minutes of movement per day – and this doesn’t have to be strenuous. 

If you don’t have a run in you, start with a walk. If you don’t have 30 minutes in you, start with 10. When it comes to movement, done is better than perfect. Tom Rath’s book, Eat Move Sleep: How Small Choices Lead to Big Changes, is a fantastic source of practical tips on making exercise a daily habit, rather than some huge commitment:  “If you don’t do any formal exercise today, start by walking a few times a week, or spend even 15 minutes engaged in something that increases your heart rate.” 

Getting out for a 30-minute walk in nature – nature in itself boasts a whole load of stress-reducing benefits – can flip the hormone story on its head. Instead of cortisol and adrenaline, movement sees the release of key neurotransmitters, often called “happy chemicals” that regulate mood, pleasure, motivation and well-being. Endorphins, dopamine and serotonin each have different “jobs” and work in cohesion to support overall good mental health. 

Endorphins are natural chemicals your brain makes to reduce pain and boost well-being, often being referred to as the body’s natural painkillers. Exercise triggers endorphins when the activity is sustained and moderately challenging, leading your brain to release endorphins to help you cope with physical strain, and to push through discomfort and/or fatigue. Turns out, when our PE teachers wouldn’t let us out of cross country because we had period pains, they actually knew a thing or two about how that dreaded trot around the field might actually help. 

Dopamine is the motivation and reward chemical. Exercise creates a natural sense of accomplishment, leading to an immediate spike in dopamine and, in turn, helps to control your attention and working memory. Have you ever made it through a really tough run or workout and hated every second of it up until the point where you finished, only to suddenly feel like could probably enter an Ironman competition and win? Yep – that was the dopamine. 

Unlike dopamine, serotonin does not show a sharp, immediate spike after exercise. Instead, exercise changes how amino acids circulate in the blood, allowing more tryptophan – the building block of serotonin – to enter the brain, supporting increased serotonin production over time. Serotonin production and release is also increased by sunlight, which is why getting outside for a walk can make you feel much calmer and more alert. Raised serotonin during the day then leads to better melatonin release at night, improving the likelihood of you getting a good night sleep and – according to the National Sleep Foundation – people who exercise regularly are also 30% more likely to report feeling rested and have improved sleep quality.  

On that note… 

2. Pay attention to quantity and quality of your sleep 

There’s no shortage of research or books that tell us how important sleep is for our mental health and mood. But, if we’re being totally honest with ourselves, we really don’t need to read the science to know that it’s true. We’ve all felt irritable the day after a bad nights’ sleep. We’re less patient, we’re snappier, we find it hard to concentrate, our emotional regulation is weaker.   

Getting enough good quality sleep is the foundation of emotional resilience. Without enough, your body overproduces cortisol, we feel tense and anxious and everything feels harder. The amygdala is the brain’s “threat detector”.  Sleep deprivation makes it more sensitive, so small problems feel bigger.  I learnt this for myself after the birth of my second daughter: It was impossible to get enough sleep with a baby and a toddler to care for, and for months I felt anxious as a result.  (If you are a parent of small children who don’t sleep well reading this; skip this section! I know there’s very little you can do. It won’t last forever, I promise! I found everything so much easier once mine were both sleeping through the night). 

As adults, it’s recommended that we get between seven and nine hours of sleep per night, with things like gender and age playing a part in where we fall in that bracket. But for those of us that are time-poor, finding nine hours in a 24-hour period to do literally nothing can be something we really struggle to get on board with. 

Arianna Huffington’s The Sleep Revolution: Transforming Your Life, One Night at a Time highlights the importance of sleep in modern life and why we need to change how we think about and treat sleep, both personally and culturally. Huffington argues that sleep isn’t a luxury or a waste of time, but a fundamental human need that affects health, productivity, decision-making, relationships and happiness. And she’s right: with the rise of “hustle culture”, social media feeds full of posts about ridiculous morning routines, and more and more of us attempting to wear productivity as a badge of honour, the impact on our mental health – and our stress levels – cannot be overlooked. 

Quality of sleep is also important. From my reading on this topic, here’s the headlines for getting a decent night’s sleep (rather than just a long one): 

• Sleep Schedule: Whenever you can, go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, even on weekends. This helps to regulate your circadian rhythm, making it easier to fall asleep and wake up naturally. 
• Environment: Keep your bedroom cool, dark and quiet, using blackout curtains, eye masks or white noise machines if needed 
• Screen time: Avoid phones, tablets and computers 1 hour before bedtime. Blue light delays melatonin production, which is what signals your brain it’s time to sleep. 
• Exercise: Regularly. We just covered this. 
• Nutrition: Avoid caffeine after midday and try to keep your evening meal light; eating heavy too close to bedtime or drinking caffeine when you’re trying to wind down, can both make falling asleep more difficult.  I’ve also learned to avoid carbs late in the evening as they can cause my blood glucose to peak and then crash in the middle of the night, which can create an adrenaline surge which wakes me up around 4am. Instead, I choose a protein snack if I’m hungry in the evening, which releases glucose more gradually. 

And that brings me nicely onto the next piece of advice. 

3. Pay attention to hydration, nutrition – and the false friendship of alcohol and caffeine 

One of the simplest yet most impactful things we can do for wellbeing is to drink plenty of water, and choose more of the foods (fresh fruit and veg) that hydrate us. Hydration helps support mood by keeping the brain functioning properly and reducing physical stress on the body. Even mild dehydration can lead to fatigue, headaches, irritability and difficulty concentrating, which can make emotions feel harder to manage. Drinking enough water helps maintain steady energy levels, supports clear thinking and keeps the nervous system more balanced. As a result, staying hydrated can make it easier to cope with stress and maintain a more stable, positive mood throughout the day. So, before you reach for a cup of coffee in the morning, do you brain a favour and drink a glass of water first. 

If you start your day the right way, you’re more likely to continue positive habits throughout the day, too. 

Another place to get curious about the impact of our micro-choices is food. We know that eating a healthy, balanced diet makes sense for so many reasons – and by balance, I really do mean balance. Eat the chocolate, have the cake; whatever else it is that makes you do a little happy food dance. But pay attention to your state after each choice.  When we opt for ultra processed foods for convenience or skip meals due to time restraints, we find ourselves in danger of entering into another stress loop. When you skip meals or reach for sugary foods, your blood sugar can spike and crash, making you feel irritable, anxious, shaky, or tired – which can increase stress.  Since 2024 I’ve been learning about glucose and experimenting with what and how I eat, following the guidance of a brilliant biochemist called Jessie Inchauspe, aka the Glucose Goddess. Following her on Instagram and following her simple rules on how to eat has had a HUGE impact on my energy levels – I have so much more energy in the afternoons now, in spite of all the other challenges that come with being 52. 

Additionally, if we don’t eat a diet containing enough nutrients, stress can feel harder to manage. As a start, we need: 

• Magnesium: Which supports relaxation and helps calm the nervous system (found in nuts, seeds, whole grains and leafy greens) 
• B vitamins: Which helps with energy and stress response (found in whole grains, eggs, dairy and legumes) 
• Omega-3 fats: Which supports brain health and emotional regulation (found in fish, walnuts and flax/chia seeds) 

It’s widely known that drinking caffeine is the evenings is, for most of us, a terrible idea.  But there’s far more to caffeine reduction than simply cutting out your afternoon coffee and ditching the Diet Coke. Caffeine creates artificial spikes in energy – and therefore mood – which, if not managed appropriately, can lead to the “come down” effect of harder drugs.  My friend Dr Tara Swart is convinced that if caffeine was newly discovered, it would be controlled as a Class B or even a Class A drug.  The constant up and down can wreak havoc with your body’s hormones, and the artificial production of dopamine encourages caffeine dependency. There are a few good books that are worth diving into if you’re someone who considers yourself unbearable before you’ve had your morning fix: 

• Caffeine Blue: Wake Up to the Hidden Dangers of America’s #1 Drug – Written by Stephen Cherniske, one of most accomplished nutritional biochemists and medical writers in his field. This book provides a step-by-step, clinically-proven program that reduces your caffeine intake and suggests effective ways to boost your energy with nutrients, healthy beverages, better sleep and high-energy habits. 
• The Coffee Lover’s Diet: Change Your Coffee, Change Your Life – Explores how coffee (and caffeine) affects your metabolism, stress levels and mood. Dr. Arnot provides a balanced perspective on how to incorporate coffee into a healthy diet without letting it negatively affect mental health or increase stress. 
• Caffeine: How Caffeine Created the Modern World – Journalist and professor, Michael Pollan, focusses on the historical impact of caffeine, but it also delves into how caffeine affects our brains, stress levels and overall well-being. Pollan explores the role of caffeine in shaping culture and productivity, which ties into how it affects mood and stress. 

And it’s not just caffeine that we have to look at when we consider how what we consume can impact our stress levels. Every aspect of our diet can either have a positive or negative impact, so it’s imperative that we take stock, once in a while, of what we’re including in our overall diet. While that glass of red of an evening can have the initial “Ahhh, that’s better!” feeling, even just one glass of wine (if it’s an everyday occurrence) can have long lasting negative implications. 

I will never tell people to cut certain food or drink altogether. An occasional glass of our favourite wine or piece of chocolate adds to pleasure and enjoyment, and we all want a life rich on those.  However, I do encourage my clients to be curious about the real impact of their choices. It’s easy to occasionally fall victim to excessive consumption. In a survey by Alcohol Change UK, 44% of people said drinking alcohol made their mental wellbeing worse – including increased anxiety, trouble sleeping, sadness and irritability after drinking. And while many people use alcohol as a coping mechanism for stress, the “stress-alcohol loop” is likely to do more harm than good: 

1. Feel stressed 
2. Drink to relax 
3. Temporary calm 
4. Rebound anxiety and poor sleep 
5. More stress the next day 

That loop is why alcohol is not a reliable stress reliever, even though it can temporarily feel like one.   

4. Be mindful about how you spend your downtime.  

Confession time: I’m a doom-scroller.  When I’m tired after a long day at work, it’s very easy to sink into the sofa and lose an hour or more to mindless doom scrolling.   When my brain is fried, Instagram offers what feels like soothing entertainment. 

And for some people, that genuinely is relaxing. If that’s you and you close your phone feeling calmer and more rested, then great (although I’d urge you to ask yourself if that’s really the case). But for many of us, the opposite is true. We put our phones down feeling overstimulated, tense, comparison-heavy or oddly flat – and then wonder why we can’t sleep.  

Neuroscientist, TJ Power, explains this brilliantly in a recent interview on The Science of Happiness podcast. He talks about how the over-consumption of short-form content (endless fast, algorithm-driven clips) keeps the brain in a state of heightened alert, rather than true rest. Instead of switching off, we stay stuck in a loop of novelty-seeking and dopamine spikes, which can increase anxiety, reduce attention span and make it harder for the nervous system to properly downshift. 

The key distinction here is distraction versus restoration. Not all downtime is created equal. 

Making time – even a small amount – for longer-form content like books, films or calming podcasts allows the brain to settle into a slower, more coherent rhythm. Especially if what you’re consuming helps you relax, feel comforted or makes you laugh. Laughter, in particular, is hugely underrated. It isn’t a luxury; it’s a reset button. It changes your blood chemistry, reducing cortisol and increasing feel-good hormones like endorphins. 

So, watch something funny; re-watch a comfort show; listen to a soothing or uplifting podcast; read a few pages of a book instead of refreshing your feed for the fifth time. Let yourself unwind in a way that actually serves you – not just something that fills the silence. Speaking of serving you and not getting lost in your phone (I love how all these things link together)… 

5. Create Space for Relationships and Real Connection 

Life as a working parent can be full on.  My daughters are teenagers now, so its WAY less intense than it used to be.  But still, they are always our first priority, and their needs are often un-predictable. When work and family life gets busy, the first thing I sacrifice is time with friends. We tell ourselves we’ll catch up when things calm down; when work is less intense, when we’re less tired. Fun and social engagements start to feel optional. Indulgent even.  

I was regularly guilty of this throughout my over-working, frazzled twenties. I cancelled plans, arrived late and left early. I was always exhausted and always telling myself I just needed to get through the next busy patch. But connection isn’t something we earn once we’ve finished everything else. It’s something we need, especially when life feels demanding. 

Human connection is one of the most powerful antidotes to stress we have. Even a few minutes of real connection – being listened to, making eye contact, feeling understood – can shift your entire nervous system. I’ve learned a great deal about this from Dr Tara Swart, who is a medical doctor, psychiatrist and neuroscientist (and who I’m fortunate enough to have as a friend, too). She frequently speaks about how one of the fastest ways to reduce cortisol in the bloodstream is through connection, particularly feeling genuinely heard by another person. When we feel safe, seen and understood, the brain receives a signal that the “threat” has passed, reducing the production of stress hormones. 

For most of us, in-person connection is especially powerful, with eye contact, shared laughter and physical presence all playing a role. Physical touch (things like hugs or handholding) can also be incredibly effective in reducing stress, as it stimulates the release of oxytocin, often referred to as the “bonding hormone”.  This isn’t just anecdotal; there’s a strong body of published research linking social connection with reduced stress, improved emotional regulation and better overall mental health. 

So, if life feels overwhelming, try not to isolate yourself further. Send the message. Take the walk together. Sit and talk without multitasking. You don’t need hours: sometimes a short, meaningful connection is enough to remind your nervous system that you’re not carrying everything alone. 

With Love 

These aren’t revolutionary ideas. But they work. And far too often, they are the first things we forget when life gets busy.  

Occasional stress is part of being human. And we can all learn to shake it off. But, if you’re keen and committed to become a calmer, less frazzled version of yourself, I have a gift for you. 

Elise and I have compiled the best tools and resources from decades of experience of working with people in large organisations who want to improve their resilience and reduce stress. We call it the ‘De-Frazzle Self-Coaching Playlist’ and it’s a fantastic curated list of resources, perfect for someone who is ready to invest in their learning, but who doesn’t yet have budget to hire their own coach.  It can be downloaded for free via the Linktree in my Instagram bio.